


constellations

by perixinkle



Category: Rick and Morty
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, dying n stuff, hurt morty, ill think of a better title hopefully, lots and lots of angst, no c137, rickmorty will have warnings before chapters, tags will change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-08
Updated: 2017-12-08
Packaged: 2019-02-12 04:06:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12950943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perixinkle/pseuds/perixinkle
Summary: They were stars, constellations in the infinite abyss of space.And that was okay. They always found each other.or: Glimpses of different versions of Rick and Morty, and their lives.There's no vast difference, really.Life is harsh.





	1. i

Ricks were a constant in every known universe.

Mortys, not always.

That didn't make them any less special.

They were stars, constellations in the infinite abyss of space. 

And that was okay. They always found each other.


	2. aquarius

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> aquarius: the water bearer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning for implied morty-liking-rick?

_"Stop crying, y-you big baby." Rick murmured, crouching over a crying Morty who was kneeling on purple grass, smoke coming from destroyed ships, their clothes smothered by ash and fire._

_"I- I can't.." Morty sobbed._

* * *

 

Morty was a very emotional person.

He hated himself for it.

He always cried, always. Whenever his emotions felt full and shriveled up his heart until he finally exploded, dam breaking as tears flowed freely down his cheeks, shook his chest with heavy sobs, people teased him for it. He would blush in embarassment as he wiped his tears, his teachers letting him stay in the clinic. His family got used to it, though. All he got from his family were looks of pity as if he were a kicked puppy. Maybe he was.

He hated it, hated how people thought he was a gentle scared little animal that would break and run away by a single touch too hard.

But they were right. It's why Rick took him to selected adventures where it wouldn't be too much, and if it were, he always cried and had to take breaks. Rick had to calm Morty down in their ship when Morty basically had a panic attack from learning the Citadel of Ricks existence. Morty was full of life pandering questions for a week after that. He felt so stupid.

Rick was so patient with him, though. He was the only one who understood the boy.

_He wonders if Rick's just putting up with his wimpy, sensitive, whiney doormat self, and he actually hates him._

Morty cried mostly from sadness. Morty would cry for hours in his room, tears somehow never running out. His body was a cushion full of water and emotional moments would spread throughout his body like squid ink, turning himself into a helpless body that could only wail and weep, a black abyss of sorrow that reflected his glassy eyes that have seen it all.

Rick always comforted him, became the cleansing water in Morty's weak body.

Other times, it was anger. He would always see his vision blur from his tears when in an argument, the frustration tearing him and heating his body up, his skin flushing red like the flash of crimson anger in his eyes. Tears would stream down his face as he pushed and shoved whatever or whoever was in his way, throwing whatever he could grab, ears ringing loud enough for him not to hear the loud crash. He would scream his feelings out, until his screams were louder than the ringing in his ears.

Rick always hugged him gently, cautiously, waited until Morty's screaming quieted down, gentle words whispered into his ears.

Happiness. Morty rarely ever felt happiness so strongly, but he remembers a few moments. And all of them were with Rick. The best one in particular was Rick saving both of their asses when Morty thought they were doomed. His chest sagged in relief and bunched up again, tackling Rick and laughing, smothering his wet face on his grandfather's shirt. It felt like the sun shone down on Rick and Morty and angels sang from above as his heart fluttered and tingled, his eyes sparkling true joy through the tears. That was the best kind of crying.

But the worst kind of crying, was not crying at all.

It was the most normal mediocre lazy day ever. Jerry watched his "boring" TV on the couch, Morty and Beth had to deal with Jerry's "boring" TV, while Summer tapped away on her phone, not paying full attention.

Until a green portal opened right infront of them, Jerry shouting out an indignant "Hey!". Morty, expecting for his Rick to come through, was shocked when a Rick with quite a uniform and two serious-looking guard Ricks surrounding him stepped out of the portal. Their faces were stern, but still held a certain sadness, like his Rick.

One of the Ricks took the remote and turned the TV off, rolling his eyes at Jerry's pathethic attempt to snatch the remote back. The man in question only crossed his arms over his chest like a child with a raised eyebrow, waiting for them to go about their business.

"This is a very serious announcement thing, Jerry," the Rick on the left sneered, "w-w-we don't need your stupid TV ruining the emoti _*urrrrp*_ on or wh- whatever the people who run shows say."

"What are you-"

"Shut up, Jerry." said all of the Ricks at the same time. Morty was slightly amused, and it must've caught Summer's attention as she put her phone down, and actually listened.

"Anyway, Morty, Summer, Beth and.. Jerry.." Rick X-099, as Morty squinted at their badges, sneered again, "of W-448, your Rick has been tracked, found and confirmed deceased."

"Wh-what?" the brunet asked quietly, not believing what he heard.

"W-we tracked your Rick because there wasn't-- wasn't a Morty wh-who covered his genius waves, and found him lacking a heartbeat. We searched for him, and now he's confi _*urrrp*_ rmed dead. There ya go."

Morty instantly froze, and he didn't notice it at first, but his mother did too. His world shrunk down and seemed far away from him, and the only words echoing were "Rick" and "Dead". He saw only pure white, and a faint image of Rick saying _"Don't- don't worry Morty, grandpa's here."_

_Fuck,_ he thought, his heart hollow in his chest.

_Fuck._

 

* * *

 

Anger had hit Beth like a truck.

It was calm and suddenly, like a switch being flipped, she stood up and threw whatever she could grab to whatever direction she could throw at. Eyeliner and mascara stained her face as she cried, screaming nonsense she couldn't hear over her own blood rushing, only seeing red.

Jerry took Summer and Morty, taking them into the lounge and closing the door. He didn't lock it, he didn't want a broken door. His wife became stronger with the sudden adrenaline of denial that her father, her real father, was dead.

He breathed heavily and looked back at his children. Summer seemed terrified, flinching and ducking at a crash of a vase that wasn't aimed at her, or even near her. The crash came from the living room and also her mother's wrath.

"Jesus Christ.." she muttered, slightly shaking. She looked at Morty and was shocked to see her brother all zoned out, unmoving but breathing steadily. His eyes looked dead, glassy, as if he was staring into the infinite abyss of the purpose and answer of life.

He's not crying. He's not screaming for his mother to stop.

"Dad.. Should we be concerned..?"

Jerry was looking at Morty with worry too, but sighed. All they could do was wait Beth out, comfort her, and wait Morty out.

"I don't know, Summer." He tried pushing a nearby table over, obviously failing. He grunted and continued trying for about a minute. Summer watched him, distracting her terror by wondering how her mom could've chosen to marry him.

"Uh.. Dad?"

"Just help me, okay?" he exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air.

"Okay, fine."

"Three..two.. one.." Jerry counted down.

They flipped the table over, causing a loud thud that Beth probably might have heard. Jerry sat down behind the table that provided as a shield or maybe a hiding spot, taking Morty's limp body next to him. Summer sat next to him and scoffed.

"This did not benefit us in any way." his daughter scoffed.

"...I know."

"Dad..?" her increasing concern showed in her voice when the crashing and loud footsteps became nearer.

"We'll be okay.."

He could hear his heartbeat getting louder and louder, suffocating him.

_I know we'll be okay._

 

* * *

 

No one was really okay.

After Beth calmed down and red drained out from her eyes, she immediately fell to the floor on her knees, and cried until her heart hurt. Jerry took a whole two weeks of half-assed comforting until Beth was back at being a slightly functional mother, however a bit teary-eyed with nightmares taunting her at the back of her mind.

Summer was doing pretty good, only shuddering or getting memories whenever she would walk by the garage or Rick's bedroom. She didn't get to hang out with him often, but she was still affected.

So now, it's been two or three months, everyone's trying to forget Rick and move on, but the house without some sort of sci-fi noise, a loud explosion, maybe the clatter of tools on the garage floor, it all felt alien. Nothing was the same anymore, but Morty's the same.

He hasn't cried since that day, and he wishes he could. There's no clench of a heart, no water for a dam to break, no tension building up in chest for him to explode. It's just numbness and his cold, cold heart that he could barely feel beating.

The brunet hasn't been in school. He's barely eaten for the past week, and yet he feels no pain, no watery eyes. He looks at himself through his phone's black screen and doesn't recognize the reflection looking back. He blinks at his pale skin and his dark bags under his eyes.

_What have I become?_

His heart still feels hollow, and his fingertips are cold enough to give himself frostbites. His bed is messy as his hair. He hasn't moved from his bed, unless to take a leak, for days.

Morty hears three gentle knocks on his bedroom door. The extra light from the hallway slightly blinds him, but he sees Summer with a plate of.. something.

"I made you chicken nuggets, Morty. They're not dry, I promise." Summer laughed awkwardly at the end of her sentence, putting the plate down on his bedside table. Morty only groaned in response. He wanted her to get out, feeling her aura of pity and concern. He felt mocked by it.

"See ya soon, bro." She pat Morty's head and walked out.

_Fucking chicken nuggets._

He remembers Rick raving off on about some random chicken nugget sauce thing in McDonalds.

_That was our last adventure.._ he thought.

 

* * *

 

_"Morty!" His digital alarm clock flashed 2am at him, but the familiar call of his name and belch by Rick was something Morty was used to. He slowly sat up and rubbed his eyes, seeing the green glow of the portal infront of his bed. "Wake up, Morty!"_

_"Let's go to McDonalds, Morty!"_

_"Wh-what?" he asked groggily._ What was Rick talking about?

_"W-we're going to McDonalds!"_

_"Do we- do we have to use the portal?" Morty groaned as Rick slightly shook him, his eyes sparkling with the excitement of a child. This whole thing reminded Morty of a child on Christmas._

Heh, cute.

No, grandpa, bad, Morty.

Man, even his angel and devil voices were sleepy.

_"Alriiiight, I-I'm coming.." He stretched, almost punching Rick in the face._

_"Jeez, Morty."_

_"Sorry." Morty laughed, getting up and putting on his shirt._

_"So," he awkwardly tried to make small talk as he put his clothes on, "Wh-what's special about this McDonalds thing? Is it- is it like, future McDonalds or something? With robotic burger spiders?"_

_A slight pause._

_"No, Morty."_

_"O-okay then." Morty grinned. "I'm ready."_

_"Cool." Rick grabbed Morty by the wrist. But that was the time when Rick thought it was appropriate to say something._

_"By the way, w-we're going to McDonald's in 1998! So you better not let- not let anyone we know now see us!"_

_"W-wait wha--"_

_They ran into the portal._

 

* * *

 

Suddenly, Morty gripped his arm tightly with his fingernails, hard enough to give him cresent shaped marks on his skin, hard enough that his fingertips could feel blood thrumming from underneath threatening to come out. Looming feelings filled his whole body, filled tension in his chest. He could feel his eyes water. He was growing so cold that it hurt.

He gripped harder enough that he bled. He felt frostbites.

Cold enough that it hurt.

His pain came alive, and as his heart clenched harder than ever before from sorrow, his head spun with so many questions and emotions. His blood rushed with adrenaline, and Morty fucking screamed. Like the dam finally broke. He screamed louder than the voices in his head that suddenly came alive, the voices that suddenly screamed with him in raw sadness and anger, trying to compete with each other.

_I fucking miss you, Rick Sanchez._

The boy screamed to let out his frustrations, his rage, his agony and his old regrets out. He feels blood going down his arm and his dingers but he doesn't stop, he continues screaming. Whenever he'd run out of breath, he'd collect it all and scream out until his lungs would feel weak, his head dizzy, like he'd pass out. His mind was a dark confusing black scribble, but he's never felt so alive.

His family came running into his room, but Morty didn't care. He kept screaming, crying and wailing in pure, red hot pain, the one his body's been hiding after all this time.

_Please come back. We can eat McDonalds all day together._

He didn't notice his chest wracking out heavy sobs, nor his family watching him in astonishment. Morty's crumpled face and his whole body was wet, from sweat, tears and blood. His temperature was a vast difference from the cold numbness he felt minutes ago. He felt pain, and it was real. He was real. Morty finally felt fucking real, and he couldn't believe he welcomed all the crying agonized voices in his head. His chest filled with both hurt and relief. He doesn't get it, but that's okay.

Beth left and came back with a first aid kit, but she still watched Morty with happiness in her eyes.

Their cry baby was back.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i added a moment of jerry being a loser for the lulz  
> also i use a lot of the same words when i write so prepare for that throughout the chapters  
> lengths of each chapter will fluctate
> 
> thanks for reading! comments and kudos are very much appreciated, though i take a while to answer comments haha

**Author's Note:**

> chapters named roman numbers aren't really chapters haha  
> i just thought id say that


End file.
